thank you for taking the time to read my questions and thoughts below. your blog is fantastic and inspiring to read.
my questions for you are about poppers. sorry if this a topic you have discussed before but I wasn’t able to find any posts about it.
I used to be a regular user of poppers. I have never been a drug user but have loved poppers since someone first stuck them under my nose in a darkroom in new york when I was in my 20s. when I lived in berlin a typical friday or saturday night was to pick up a bottle of fresh poppers and head to any number of the cruise bars.
I also used poppers often for jerking-off and sometimes to just get a buzz while I was laying around the house. I also love poppers porn and poppers training videos. I guess you could say poppers are a real turn on for me. I also should state they aren’t a crutch and I’ve had plenty of sex without poppers and can get aroused and climax easily without them, but when bottoming it is much more comfortable for me when I use poppers and I cannot be fisted without them (at least I don’t think I can).
Getting to my question…about two years ago I was diagnosed with high blood pressure and now have to take medication daily for it. Though I haven’t spoken with my doctor about this, my understanding is it is quite dangerous to use poppers while on high blood pressure medicine, somewhat akin to using Viagra with poppers. do you have any information on this? furthermore, I would be interested to know your thoughts in general on poppers?
it has been about two years since I have used poppers in that time i have of course still had plenty of sex though bottoming is less comfortable and i haven’t been fisted. i still watch poppers porn because it is a massive turn on and poppers training videos but i don’t join in anymore. do you have any suggestions on how i can replace that euphoria one gets from poppers during sex and a way to make bottoming and fisting more comfortable?
thank you so much!
Poppers pig, it sounds like you need to talk to a doctor who is aware of everything in your life, including how much you love poppers. I’m not a doctor, so I cannot give medical advice, and since you have a condition that requires medical attention, I don’t feel comfortable suggesting anything in place of poppers.
For what it’s worth, I love poppers too. I almost always use them when I have sex. I won’t rehash tired arguments like the ones you’ve probably heard from people who claim that sober sex is the best sex or the “purest” sex because we both know that’s not true. There’s a reason so many people use poppers (and other substances) when they bang. Sex on substances is fun.
It’s not always better, but definitely fun. Those concerned with public health and the epidemic of severe drug use among queer people would do well to take a moment, before pathologizing substance use, and acknowledge the fact that we enjoy these things because on some level they enrich our lives, at least for a little bit, and perhaps only to an extent. That doesn’t mean they’re healthy — none of them are. But chasing pleasurable experience isn’t wrong and doesn’t make you sick.
I don’t have any techniques in my back pocket to help you enjoy sex without poppers, nor do I have any backup substances that I consider safe with your condition. All I can suggest is that you find a medical professional you can be honest with.
You should ask your doctor for full clarification on what dangers exist when combining something you love (poppers) with something you need (blood pressure medication), and if he or she immediately shames you, pathologizes you, or tells you you’re being reckless and irresponsible for even asking, find a new doctor. That doctor is not committed to your health. The fact is, if you love poppers, you will likely use them again in the heat of the moment, to hell with safety. That’s why you need a doc you can be honest with.
I’ll add this: I’ve had great sober sex and know people who have incredible, hardcore sober sex. The body is capable, but getting there requires time, training, and years of effort. If you’re willing to work, you can enjoy what you like without poppers. Perhaps not immediately, and maybe not even in six months, but you’ll get there. If you choose to go this route, it may not be easy, but at the end of it, you will have a completely new understanding and appreciation of your ability — and that, friend, will be beautiful.